Thursday, March 1, 2012


[Warning: post does some cursing and utilizes unladylike language.]

Dear Arrogant Asshole on the blue mat,

When I say that you were my first, I’m not being coy. Truly sweetie, you’re the first utter douchebag I’ve ever had in yoga class. I’ve been doing this yoga thing for years, yet I’ve never experienced someone quite like you.

Admittedly, Bikram is the kind of yoga that is most likely to attract asshats like you, but even after these many months, it seems that you still don’t get how our hot yoga works. Bikram’s not like other yoga; it even gets criticized for not being like other yoga. But we Bikram yogis like it the way it is.

And here’s how it is: You move as a group.

For real . . . (read more)


whitneyingram said...


You inspired me to write something similar on my blog. Go read it.

tom lindsey said...

My son has a film project due at the end of the term that he has yet to start. Your rant here has given me an idea. Let me set the scene.

Yoga class, 9pm:

Surrounded by uptight women bending and twisting themselves into sweaty human origami, a fat guy in a turtle costume, lying on his back, tears slowly but desperately at the sky.